...that Bisk took up space.

COWS.

...that Bisk gave up, again.

Harry Potter month isn't working out.
But you should still read the books, if you haven't already.

You should suggest things for me to do!

...that Bisk's exercise habits became sort of awesome!

So, today, I discovered a new skill.
This one will take some explanation. Most of our doorways are normal, but we have a few that are closer to a two-foot wide doorway, and have flat wall things.
I just realised that I can climb those flat wall things.
You push your back against one, and kick a foot up on the other. Then you have to bring the other foot up, which is kind of scary. But after that, you can just scoot yourself up the wall. It's actually quite comfortable.
The bad news is, you need some friction to do this, so it's easiest with shoes. The reason this is bad news is that, for some reason, mothers don't seem to love having footprints on their walls.
Whatever. It's fun! And I'm sure it's not a bad workout...

...that Bisk went slightly crazy.

Bleeeeeeeeeeh.
I feel like I haven't slept in forever.
That wasn't hyperbole.
Also, I may have started to think in iambic pentameter.
New post sometime this century.

...that Bisk read and blogged Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's/Philosopher's Stone.

Already, I'm late.
But yes, here it is. Book one. Where the adventure began. I remember reading this as a little kid...
The story begins with Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, a boring couple, and their unpleasant young son, Dudley. They live in fear that someone will discover their dark secret, Mrs. Potter, who is Mrs. Dursley's sister. And Mr. Dursley, one day, hears whispers about someone who might be his nephew.
That night, an odd assortment of people leave the Dursley's nephew, one-year-old Harry Potter, on the doorstep.
Ten years later, Harry is living in the closet under the stairs. He wears fat Dudley's old clothes and has a generally miserable existence. It's Dudley's birthday, and the old lady who babysits Harry usually has a broken leg. So Harry comes to the zoo, despite bratty Dudley's protests. It's not bad, until he starts having a conversation with a snake, and the glass disappears, and the snake gets loose. Harry is punished by going to his cupboard for a long time.
He finally gets out sometime during the summer holidays. Someone sends him a mysterious letter, Uncle Vernon (Mr. Dursley) takes it. The letter sender is very persistent and creative, and the Dursleys and Harry end up on a tiny island in the middle of a huge storm. At exactly midnight, Harry turns eleven, and an enormous man shows up. His name is Hagrid, he works at Hogwarts. Harry has no idea what he's talking about. Hagrid is not happy about this, but explains that Harry is a wizard, and that his parents were killed by Lord Voldemort, not in a car crash. The Dursleys get mad, Hagrid gives Dudley a pig tail.
The next morning, Harry and Hagrid go to London to shop for his school supplies. They go through a small bar, where everyone is honoured to meet Harry, into Diagon Alley. It's amazing and lovely, Harry gets all his things, his wand is connected to Voldemort's, Hagrid gives him an owl, etc.
Harry goes to King's Cross on September 1st, he can't find the correct platform. He meets a lovely, large family, the Weasleys, and they help him get to Platform 9 and 3/4. He boards the train, he goes to Hogwarts. He's sorted into Gryffindor, where dwell the brave in heart.
His classes are difficult, but get better once he learns the basics. His main enemy is Draco Malfoy, a Slytherin, who he met in Diagon Alley, and who is a buttface. At the first flying lesson, a boy named Neville breaks his wrist falling off his broom. Once the teacher has left with Neville, Malfoy steals one of Neville's things. He flies away with it, Harry chases him and catches it. Professor McGonagall sees, but puts him on the Gryffindor quidditch team instead of punishing him.
McGonagall gets Harry the very best broomstick there is, a Nimbus Two Thousand. First years usually aren't allowed to have broomsticks, but Harry is because he's on the team. This makes Malfoy mad, he challenges Harry to a duel.
Harry sneaks out with Ron to the duel, Hermione (a girl who's been following them around being bossy) and Neville follow them. Malfoy's not there, but he's told Filch, the caretaker who is eager to punish anyone who does anything wrong. They hide from him in a locked room that is supposed to be off limits. There's a three headed dog in there, which Hermione points out, is standing on a trapdoor.
Later, Ron is criticizing Hermione, and she overhears. She hides in the bathrooms. That night, a troll is let in. Harry and Ron go to save Hermione, and fight off the troll, saving her life.
Harry plays in his first quidditch match. He is the Seeker, so he must catch the Golden Snitch. I'll explain quidditch later. During the match, he loses control of his broom. Hermione is sure that Professor Snape is jinxing him. She sets his robes on fire, and Harry regains control. He nearly swallows the Snitch, but Gryffindor wins.
Stuff crucial to the plot but too detailed for me to talk about here happens. If you haven't read the book, go read it. Anyways...
Hagrid has a baby dragon, but he needs to get rid of it. Ron's brother Charlie works with dragons in Romania, they smuggle Norbert (the dragon) up to give to Charlie. Malfoy knows, tells McGonagall, they all get in trouble. They go into the Forbidden Forest with Hagrid. Something is killing the unicorns, Harry sees a cloaked figure drinking unicorn blood.
Time passes...
Harry figures out that the three-headed dog is guarding the Sorcerer's Stone, which creates the Elixir of Life.  Harry thinks that Snape is trying to steal the stone. He, Ron, and Hermione go to stop him, Neville attempts to stop them. They get past him, and work through the defenses, but Harry is the only one who makes it to the final room. In there, he finds not Snape, but Professor Quirrel, a timid professor. Also there is the Mirror of Erised, which he saw his parents in before. He gets the stone from looking in the Mirror, Quirrel reveals that he has Voldemort sprouting out of his head. But he can't touch Harry, Harry gets out, Gryffindor wins the house cup, yay!

I'll post quotes and stuff eventually. I left out a lot of detail, but if you haven't already read the book, you really should.

Biskvitka I Mlyako and the Copyright Law

So, you may have noticed that Harry Potter has yet to even begin to be blogged. This is mainly because I'm lazy.
But I've been checking copyright law, and as far as I can find, this plan is legal. It's an unpaid review, so I think it's okay to use quotes. There'll probably be spoilers, but if you haven't already read Harry Potter, you shouldn't be reading my reviews/blogs/musings/whatever. Also, for anyone who didn't know, Harry Potter and all of the characters and quotes discussed are the work of JK Rowling.
So I think this is fine to do. If you have the rights to Harry Potter (I am in awe of your presence if you do) and think that there's a problem with what I'm doing or want it removed, please contact me. If you can prove that you actually are who you say you are, I'll be happy to comply, although I would appreciate an explanation, so that I know how to avoid similar situations in the future.
I'll probably have book 1 up tomorrow. We haven't even really begun, and already, we're behind.

I make bad decisions when I'm tired.

This post actually isn't about the habit I'm forming of sleeping in class. No, this is about my stupidest idea yet.
I'm declaring February _Harry Potter_ month. (I get the feeling that won't underline for me...)
The goal is for me to reread all seven books and discuss them on my blog, in order, one every four days to fill up the month.
In reality, we'll be lucky to finish by the end of this century. :D
Oh well. At the very least, it will be an adventure.

Some things just make me giggle...

For example, the phrase "man cave".
It sounds like something out of Batman. Seriously:
Robin: To the Bat Cave?
Batman: No! It's still full of guano from last week.
Robin: So where are we going?
Batman: The...MAN CAVE!

This is probably the third time I've accidentally "followed" my own blog...

Great job, bisky.
I do a lot of these kinds of things. If you want me to go into detail, I can. Although I'd rather not mention some of my worst moments. Such as that one time...
I can't remember what happened that one time. My friends claim that I knocked myself unconscious on a tent.
I really hope they're making it up.
I don't even know what this is. I'm just rambling about my clumsy/stupid moments. In a few minutes, I'll probably be discussing toenails or something.
Actually, instead of toenails, I think I'll tell you about my squid. I have a few, but here's one for yoooooooooou! It won't let me link her, but search for a squid named "bisky". It says she's looking for a shirt with 10 sleeves.
I really don't have anything to do other than ramble. :\

...

Hmm I think I'm going to stop with Hunger Games. Sorry if you liked it.
I have stuff to say, which I eventually will.

Biskyland...

What is Biskyland? Well, it's where I say I live when people ask, although it has developed into a place that would be loveley to visit. I can go more into detail about that later. The main point of this post is to say that in Biskyland, your spelling rules don't really apply. So don't be surprised to see a random mix of British English, American English, and phonetic English. That's all. For now, at least...

Cinna-man and Naked Coal Miners.

There's a ripping noise. Kat explains that she's having her legs waxed. Her stylist apologizes, mentioning how hairy she is. Oh yes. Kat has stylists. Venia has aqua hair and gold tattoos. Octavia is plump with pale green skin. Flavius has orange "corkscrew locks" and purple lipstick. I'm not entirely sure wha the author means by corkscrew locks, but whatever. Yay human characters.
It turns out that Kat is getting her whole body waxed. Poor girl. Her stylists are full of compliments, telling her that she's not too ugly once all the hai and dirt is removed. Try telling a girl that on your first date. You'll definiteley be punched.
Kat sits around naked waiting to meet her actual stylist, rather than the three random stylists. He comes in. He looks mostly normal. His name is Cinna.
CINNA IS A MAN! HE'S A CINNA-MAN! CINNAMON!
Sorry. I couldn't resist.
Kat and Cinna eat fancy food for lunch. Kat imagines making it at home. She says that, after days of hard work, she could still only manage a poor substitute.
Kat seems rather whiney. I understand that life has not been kind to her, but it seems to be the only thing she ever mentions. I know several people who, in my opinion, have been through worse than she's been through so far, and none of them mention their difficulties every other sentence. Kat needs to shut up for a while.
Cinna and Kat discuss outfits. 12 usually has coal miner outfits, but Cinna wants to focus on the coal. Kat is sure that she'll be paraded in front of the nation naked and covere in coal dust. (Sexy?)
It turns out that Kat gets to wear a unitard and be set on fire. I'm sure by this point, she wants to go back to nudity.
Kat and Peeta make some jokes with each other about burning, and get on their chariot. Cinna sets them on fire. They roll into the crowd. Everyone loves Kat.
And that's basically it...

Try to resist the urge to eat yourself...

I'm back! But still quite lazy...
So, Kat and Peeta bring the vomitatious Haymitch to his room. Kat leaves Peeta to clean Haymitch's chest hair. Lovely. Also, they're still on the train. How big is it? Because I'm picturing it as a Versailles-sized train.
Kat decides a nice Peeta is bad, so she throws away the cookies Peeta's dad gave her. They land by a dandelion, and Kat talks about how, when she was starving, dandelions gave her hope. I think symbolism is usually supposed to be subtle, but the author must be afraid that we are too dumb to understand without an explanation. Kat talks about her gatherin of plants, and how she began hunting. She mentions that Peeta's dad likes to eat squirrels. Because, you know, who doesn't? Kat mentions finding a pond once and eating some fish and Katniss.
What?
Katniss ate Katniss?
It was only after rereading this passage that I realised that she was talking about a plant called "katniss", not herself. I'm proud of her for not gnawing off her arm.
Kat thinks about her family, then goes to sleep. She is woken by overly cheerful Effie. She goes to breakfast and drinks hot chocolate for the first time. She also immediately recognizes the orange juice, despite her claim that she's only had an orange once before. Hmmmmm. Veeeeeeeery suspicious...
Haymitch is drinking again. He merrily says, "Here's some advice. Stay alive."
*drama alarm rings*
Peeta is not amused. He knocks over Haymitch's drink. Haymitch slaps Peeta. Kat nearly stabs Haymitch. This drama makes Haymitch happy, he thinks Kat and Peeta might actually have a chance. Kat throws a knife at the wall. Hooray for keeping the train nice.
Soon, they are approaching the Capitol, Panem. Kat mentions that the colours look fake, and that she hopes her stylist doesn't think nudity is fashionable.

Keep reading next time to find out if Kat has to appear before the entire country completely naked!

I'll update eventually...

Probably. Maybe. Some time when I'm not as lazy. Sorry.

Chapter 3: Cookies and Soup for Katniss! :D

So Kat is taken into custody in some fancy building to say goodbye. She tells her mother and Prim to take care of themselves. She forbids Prim from taking tessarae. It seems like if she loses, she won't be able to hold Prim to that promise. She promises that she'll win. Again with the easily breakable promises. Her family leaves.
Peeta's dad comes in. He gives her cookies and promises to make sure Prim eats. Then they sit in awkward silence, because Kat will be trying to kill his son.
Next, Madge he mayor's daughter comes in. She gives Kat a gold pin. Then Gale comes in, and they discuss if killing a person is like killing an animal.
Kat leaves the building, desperately trying not to cry. Peeta cries. They get on a really fast train.
On the train, Kat takes a shower for the first time in her life. I sincerely hope this just means that she usually takes baths, not that she never washes. She looks at her pin, and says it is a mockingjay. Whaaat?
Kat explains that mockingjays are a Capitol failure. They make muttations, or mutts, which are animals that they have genetically modified into weapons. This view of genetic modification makes me suspicious that the author may own an organic grocery. Anyways, the Capitol created jabberjays to listen to rebels and report back. But the rebels were too clever, so they got rid of the jabberjays, who mated with mockingbirds, creating mockingjays.
Hooray for ignoring chromosome numbers! Next there'll be an oceloctopus, an ocelot-octopus baby. Because it's so biologically sound.
Kat goes to dinner. Effie mentions that Kat and Peeta have much nicer table manners than last year's tributes. So Kat makes a point of wiping her fingers on the tablecloth. After eating lots of rich food, Kat feels sick. She mentions that in the past, she has eaten a soup made of mouse meat, pig entrails, and tree bark. Of course she has! Isn't that everyone's favourite?
They watch a video of other reapings. Kat and Peeta laugh at Haymitch's stage dive. Effie flips out. Then Haymitch comes in. Of course, he is drunk. He pukes on the floor, and Effie...I'm not sure what Effie does... It seems like she dances through the vomit puddle, but that seems unlikely given her stance on table manners.
Whatever. The chapter ends with a vomit puddle.

So, I actually do have pictures for these posts. I'm just too lazy to post them. I'll have to have a make-up picture day.
You may have noticed my dreadful spelling. It's because I've found it easier to read while blogging on an iPod than to read while blogging on a computer. Sorry.
Also, I'm shortening Katniss's name to Kat from now on. Again with the lazy thing.
I appreciate any comments/constructive criticism. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to work on part 3.
-Bisky

Chapter 2: Killing the person who saved you isn't a very classy way to thank them

Katniss is shocked.
She maybe falls down, or maybe the boy standing next to her just wanted to feel her arm. She talks about her terrible shock. Then she does something that's an equal mix of stupid and brave.
She runs forward, announcing that she'll take Prim's spot. Prim, of course, freaks out. So does Effie, but in more of an "Um, that's not protocol" sort of way. But then she gets all "Yaaay! Katniss just didn't want her sister to get the glory! LOL!"
The mayor doesn't seem excited. Katniss think he might remember her from when her father died. I think she's imagining that. There are 8000 people in the city. Katniss's father was not the only one to die in the mines.
No one claps for Katniss. They all kiss their hands silently. It's supposed to be farewell to one you love, or something.
Charming Haymitch talks about how much he likes Katniss. He tries to hug her. Then he falls off the stage.
The boy champion is called. His name is Peeta Mellark.
Katniss flips out. She doesn't want it to be him. I'm guessing she had plans to leave Gale for this Peeta boy.
Oh, now she's explaining. After her dad died, her mom just sat around being sad. So hey were starving to death, so Katniss tried to sell random junk for food. No one bought it. So she went through the baker's trash cans until the baker's wife came and yelled at her. Then the baker's son, Peeta, burned some bread and snuck it to Katniss.
As the chapter ends, Katniss reminds us that the odds are that someone else will kill Peeta. What a cheerful girl.

Chapter 1: Cell phones, a vital source of nutrition.

Katniss, the narrator wakes up. She mentions her sister Prim havin nightmares, and ominously connects these nightmares to "the Reaping". Scary. She watches her mother and Prim sleep. She goes on and on about how beautiful her mother once was, and compares Prim to a raindrop. Then she talks about her ugly cat, Buttercup, who hates her. She says, "Entrails. No hissing. His is the closest we will ever come to love." I'm guessing that Katniss is lying, and that Buttercup will end up to be a badly named handsome prince, who Katniss will fall in love with.
Katniss goes to a fence. It's supposed to be electrified, but it's not because they don't have very reliable electricity. So she climbs it to find one of several bow and arrow sets she has hidden in the woods. Something about the way she describes her life makes things seem much too easy.
Katniss talks about how her father made all this possible, then died. She mutters (growl) about starving to deth in safety. Then she goes to find Gale, her best friend. He calls her Catnip. I wonder if she's going to abandon Buttercup for Gale?
Gale and Katniss make fun of someone and odds being ever in their favor, while tossing blackberries into the air and eating them. This is a rather boring scene if you picture them eating actual berries. However, it becomes hillarious if you picture them eating fancy cellphones instead.
Gale mentions running away. The conversation somehow turns to children, and gets really awkward. Katniss keeps telling us that she doesn't think of Gale in *that* way, but it's obvious she's lying. Poor Buttercup will be heartbroken.
Katniss and Gale go trading. They talk about wild dog soup with an old lady, and bring strawberries to the mayor. The mayor's daughter, Madge, greets them. She's dressed nicely, and some tactless comments from all parties lead to Gale being grumpy an's Katniss explaining tessarae. Basically, you can enter in the Reaping extra times to get food.
Katniss goes back home. She bathes and dresses. Her mother fixes her hair. Prim has trouble keeping her shirt tucked in. Yawn.
Everyone goes to the square. All the kids are roped off to be Reaped. They explain that the districts rebelled against the Capitol and have to send kids to fight to the death as part of the Treaty of Treason. Katniss's district, 12, has only had 2 champions. Only one still survives. His name is Haymitch, and-oh look! He's stumbling onto the stage drunk!
Haymitch is very charming. He hugs Effie Trinket, the lady Katniss was making fun of earlier. She looks revolted. She has pink hair. I wonder what pink hair smells like. Does it smell like candy floss?
Effie reaches in to draw a girl's name. Katniss hopes it isn't her.


It isn't Katniss. It's Prim.
The chapter ends here, dramatically.

The big announcement...

All of you (and by that, I mean no one) have been begging me to hint at what book I plan to blog. So now that I finally have a copy, you get to know!

So, I haven't started yet...oh, well. I've heard good things about it, but it has a positive review from Smeyer. I hope she's better at picking stories than writing them...


That's all I really have to say.
-Bisky

Um, hi?

Yaaay! I'm blogging. Well, not yet, really. *waits for books to blog* But yes, hi! That's it! I'm so exciting, aren't I?